Elaine, one of my closest friends for about 55 years, has a new baby in her family. Peter and Kylie had a baby girl by C section after Hazel’s 9 pound 6 ounce head plus body proved to be a little too challenging. Hazel may also be blessed with the Farr Family Head, which exceeds all normal measures.
Elaine’s husband Brooks passed away a couple of years ago from Alzheimer’s, and today, while being filled with gratitude that Peter and Kylie have a healthy baby, I also have grief that Brooks did not live to see this baby. Brooks loved his family in a passionate, determined way, and would have dissolved in tears at holding his grandbaby in his arms. Elaine is the quintessential kindergarten teacher/baby ogler/knit a sweater grandma, and will lay down on the railroad tracks for her Family, so Hazel will not lack for love. But I wish Brooks could have been here to welcome Hazel.
So all day on the Camino I have been conscious of the many many representations of Mary and Jesus. Baby Jesus in Mary’s arms, Mary at the 4th Station of the Cross waiting to see her tortured and humiliated son pass by, Mary holding Jesus in the Pieta, a full grown man across her lap, Mary in rapture in heaven. Portugal and Spain are full of representations of Mary, and full of images of mothers with babies. The children of Spain and Portugal run in the squares and cafes and lanes, or doze in the arms of mother or father, while hard working mothers run the cafe counter, or patient fathers smile and encourage their children. These countries love children, and are patient with them. Their religion teaches that you can reach Jesus by talking to his mother, complimenting her son, and asking her to intercede for you. She is one who can get your special prayers to the right ears. It is the mother.
And I have been thinking about cultures that honor and protect pregnant women and babies, who offer them necessities and help every child get off to a good start. We have met some representatives on this Camino. Germany, where women have a three year maternity leave. Spain, where health care is free for everyone. England, where everyone gets a midwife. Or the opposite— countries at war where boys are turned into soldiers who kill, and girls are put in rape camps and denied education. The first mark of a civilized— or Jesus-like—culture, would be protection of the helpless, the next generation, the children who cannot protect themselves. Where does America fall on these measures? Baby Hazel will cost Peter thousands of dollars for her birth, and thousands thereafter for health care and education. Peter has a great job with benefits, so Hazel will be fine. Brandon and Abbie will require thousands of dollars of care each month for little Lily Joy and I hope they have enough health care. But health care is linked to employment, so if Abbie has to stay home to care for a child with disabilities, where is her health care? Do we have guaranteed care for all American babies?
And the things men do to women. For their own egos, for macho pride, out of mental illness or drunkenness or need for power. I shudder to think of the violence to women the world over, throughout time, and in America today. And everywhere I go, there are women running businesses, banks, hotels, families, nonprofits, protests, managing to juggle babies and businesses. The world depends on women having and raising babies, and contributing as partners to men.
But today I honor mothers and their babies and wish for their health. I honor the Catholic Church for having Mary in such an honored position. I honor Peter and Kylie and Elaine and Brooks for the new life with infinite possibilities. I honor my own mother and grandmother who gave us children the very best they could imagine each day. I honor countries with cultures that protect women and nurture babies. A new baby has come to us and it is a beautiful day.
